08 March 2007

Something tells me to love...

I am listening to one of the most famous love/romance songs. Besame Mucho by Cesaria Evaro.

That has nothing to do with my feeling to write about love, today. Falling in love, is one odd mystery. Firstly, I believe, it is different for each one of us. No one can write theories and generalizations like economists or teach someone to love. What I write today has nothing more than what I know, have experienced, and question of love.

For me, love is not only the mere attraction to that of another gender, or the same. It is not the foundation for a relationship, which will eventually only lead to tying the knot. It leads to more and it is born from more. I learned to love at a very young age, the same age I learned to insult others, throw conscious tantrums, and rage at disagreeable moments.

To love, is to give...this is all I know, and agree about love. I do not believe in falling love overnight and then telling oneself this is all life has. I'll take the time to actually tell you about what I see in the love for another person, the one you believe is the one to be with.

I am completely, boringly, a pragmatic, and practical person. I swim in infatuation all year long, but have also learned to be sickeningly cautious where I put my foot. And when I do turn and look into that person's eyes, and I see my love, more than his for me; I know it. He doesn't need to love me, for me to fall in love with him. He doesn't need to remember me, but he has to be someone I know.

Here I mean, not someone's black book that I maintain. I don't need to be fetching slippers for anyone I am in love with and will not allow them to fetch my slippers. When in love I believe, it is an understanding.

I understand I love him. He knows I love him. And it ends there. I hate the beggar, commercial type, labeling each other. I don't expect everyone to be me, but I have the right to be me. I can't stand the labels, boyfriend, girlfriend...it ties you, it loses love.

Beyond all, I believe even love has to be intelligent. To people I may seem void of adventure, but have they lived my life? No! I swear this adventure is hard even for a trekker to handle. To be me is as tough as me to be you.

I have been in love, but that love has never bound me. I gave all I can to that love, but never demanded the receiver to give. As it reciprocated, I did not translate that either to love. Being intelligent in love, is something I wasn't be born with. I had to actually learn it.

Unsafe relationships happen in every single woman's life. I'd even go as far to say infatuation is to be blamed. I was once only wanting that label of a boyfriend, I had it. More than that, I needed a life. Love, gives it. Love lives beyond anything.

I don't mean dinner, moonlight dance, flowers, cards, perfumes, etc. I can buy those myself. I may even enjoy a moonlight dinner by myself. I'd even tell you when I decide I love the person.

It's when I can stand them even in their worst moments, or crankiest minutes, or the way they are early in the morning. And moreover it is that one person who makes me feel that it's okay to be that cranky, tensed, and shabby in the morning, and yet so in love.

I had it, I still have it. Nothing else makes me lucky other than the people around me who love me and whom I love more than myself.

3 comments:

firstmonsoon said...

heya Sam.

Was having this discussion just last night with a classmate..

A lot of the time you hear about falling in love being something you can't help; I don't know about the falling part of it, but the love part of it certainly has a moment - it's the moment you make that decision to let go and fly.

Samyuktha P.C. said...

true and that brings me to the beginning. no one can write theories. but it's really a wonderful feeling.. |:) .. a decision.. ) ! love. sam.

Unknown said...

It truly is a wonderful feeling. And specially so when it has no boundaries, and as your rightly say, no labels. That kills the love, and leaves you with a relationship, which isn't always the way it should have been.